Incredible India

As i near the end of my time living in India, I wanted to reflect, and talk about my experience of being a british woman in a foreign country. 

I think living in a different country, and culture is something everyone should experience.  It broadens the mind, it pushes you out of your comfort zone and gives you a plethora of amusing anecdotes!

There are many things I love about life here, and many things I'm looking forward to leaving behind.

Shopping is a good place to start, while my excess baggage may tell a different story, I hate shopping here! From the pathetic, invasive security checks (you have your bag checked very vaguely and a bit of a pat down with a metal detector if a female security guard is about, if not you walk in unchecked) to the store assistants who will not leave you alone, it really irks me. Everyone is a thief in the eyes of indian malls and supermarkets, you have to leave your shopping bag with a security guard (and queue for the pleasure, i'll get on to queuing later) and have your hand bag searched and quite often tied shut. I could save these companies millions of rupees, sack the "security" staff and get some cctv! You also have to show your receipt to another security guard on the way out so he can check you've not nicked anything..... It's so annoying! I avoid supermarkets as much as I can, the migraine inducing lights and constant loud announcements aside, it annoys me they don't have conveyor belts so the long line of customers can get out of there a bit faster. I am a typical ex pat and go to the overpriced luxury foreign food stores, not to buy marmite, weetabix, dairy milk or any other home comforts, but just to not have to deal with queues! Ok and their wine and cheese selection is pretty good!

So queuing, well that kind of thing hasn't really caught on here. My husband jokes that I am from the QK! I quickly learned in India that everyone is more important than everyone else, manners get you nowhere and personal space doesn't exist.

I do believe the whole personal space issue is one of my brit hang ups.  Families here are so close, this is something I love about India. Entire families sleeping in one room is not uncommon, so personal space is often an unknown, and in general people are very close to (physically and emotionally) and respectful of their families.  The way some of my friends in the UK speak to their parents horrifies me now after spending so much time here.  You don't really see old folks homes in India because families stick together and care for their elderly parents at home, how amazing is that?

I have even changed my mind on arranged marriage since spending time here. India has a very low divorce rate, and yes, there will be an element of pride and fear there, with some awful marriages where one half of the couple is too scared to end things, and obviously I am very much against child marriage, but i do believe when you reach a certain age, your parents probably have a good idea of who would be a good match for you.  I know a lot of very happily married couples who had arranged marriages 

I love the fact I see crazy things like goats, camels and cows in the street all the time, but the lack of organisation and structure also annoys me! And one creature i do not love has to be the mosquito, they love me but the feeling sure isn't mutual.

I love the bright colours and noise everywhere, the smells of cooking and incense. The first thing i notice when flying home is that England is dull and many shades of grey and beige. And so quiet!!! Although i do miss the silence at 2am when theres a dog pack fighting outside, a security guard blowing his whistle, horns honking and a load of nocturnal birds chirping away at my window.....

I could talk about the food for hours, as a vegetarian, India is paradise. It really is home to the best food in the world, from chole battura to vada pav, sweet lassi to warm chai, aloo gobi to rajma, biryanis and pakoras, juicy mangoes and sweet chickoos, i am spoilt for choice! I am constantly learning new recipes and the thought of boiled vegetables us brits love makes me angry! Do that cauliflower some justice and cook it in some delicious jeera!

I love the history and culture here. Last weekend we visited some beautiful caves, over 2000 years of history surrounded me and I felt humbled. India really is beautiful and I have been extremely fortunate in that I have travelled a lot.  From the beaches of Goa, to the majestic beauty of the taj mahal, the deserts of Rajasthan, the snowy peaks in Manali, the madness of old Delhi, to the quiet serenity of Pondicherry, the backwaters of Kerala, the hustle bustle of Mumbai, the incredible golden temple in Amritsar, the blue city of Jodhpur, i have seen a lot of amazing places, and met some fascinating people.  I am always struck by how enormous India is and now I think nothing of travelling 7 hours to visit somewhere for a few hours.  In the UK we think we've travelled a long way if we go from Derby to London, the time it takes for that journey (1.5 hours) is about how long it takes us to get out of Pune on a weekend! I hope I never lose this attitude and continue to travel and make the most of every moment when I'm back in the UK.

Karla caves, near pune

Jodhpur

A goan sunset

 A waterfall in Manali

Old Delhi

I find the mix of religions here really interesting. Hindu's, Sikh's, Muslim's, Catholic's, live side by side and generally seem to get on. Everyone in India has a faith and I am often struck by their devotion to their religions, this is the main drive behind me starting a degree in international studies where i will spend a year studying religion. The beauty of the gurdwaras, mosques, temples and churches is fascinating. I recommend the book Holy Cow to anyone interested in religion or India!

A mosque

Varanasi

My last few frustrations with India start with corruption, the police are feared because they rape and steal. Allegedly. The government just seems a mess to me, sorting out my husbands passport was done in such a backwards way, they issued his passport weeks ago and are now carrying out his background checks.... Reassuring! 

I also hate the way I get stared at all the time, this probably adds to why I hate shopping so much! I've constantly got Eminem in my head "y'all act like you've never seen a white person before"! It still freaks me out and scares me now, I'm forever pulling up my top or making sure my skirt is long enough to draw as little attention as possible. Young men whipping out their mobiles to "click my picture" very obviously is so weird, i'm not Katrina Kaif! what do you want with my photo-photo? 

And its the language barrier that really gets me, nothing like being stood in a lift with 4 people blatantly staring and talking about you in another language to make the blood boil! The language barrier is obviously a frustration anyone in a foreign country faces, if someone comes to the door or the phone rings and my husband isn't in i just ignore it now. Ive had hindi lessons, i have really tried to communicate but still get nowhere. I cant even order a diet coke properly, its diet coooooke apparently.

So I end my ramblings on my experience. Lessons learned? So many! While I get angry and frustrated with life in this incredible place I wouldn't change my experiences. I've learned to swallow my pride, respect others and I have patience in truckloads! The world is a beautiful, fascinating place and we need to get off our asses and see as much of it as we can.  I'm proud to be a Goyal and always be connected to Incredible India. I sure have some intereating stories for my kids about their roots! And finally, if you're indian, please don't stare at the next gauri you see, you're doing yourselves and her no favours!

Al fresco food, glorious food!

Barbeque season is officially here, in India anyway as it is COOL enough to sit out! We just had a yummy mini BBQ on our balcony, i'm vegetarian and I loved it! My ingredients for a brilliant BBQ are as follows....

- some pretty lights, i love my lanterns from Dubai 

- somebody very patient who can get those coals a'smokin (HI HUSBAND!)

- a nice sauvignon blanc or indus pride beer (lager infused with cardamom, coriander or fennel)

- corn on the cob as a v easy starter, just remove the leaves and silk and chuck on the bbq, serve with salt, pepper, lemon and a bit of butter

- homemade coleslaw as a side dish (grate half a white cabbage, 2 carrots and stir in 2 dessert spoons of mayo, use red cabbage and raisins too if you feel fancy!)

- sausages and burgers are so retro, if you fancy a (healthy) change try my kebabs!:

- chop a couple of green peppers, 2 red onions into 1/8's and throw in a big bowl with some mushrooms and a good amount of paneer or chicken chunks (we do half and half), you can use any veggies that bbq well but just be mindful they should all take the same amount of time to cook, cremated tomatoes are not a good look! Make a marinade of 1 tsp chilli flakes, half tsp turmeric, 1 tsp kitchen king masala (or garam masala), 1 tsp coriander powder, 1 tsp cumin powder, 2 tsps chicken seasoning (the one i use is paprika, dry garlic, chilli, dry onion and pepper), juice of 1 lemon, 1/2 tsp soy sauce, 2 tsp ginger garlic paste, 1 tbsp veg oil and 3 tbsp yogurt. Mix well and marinade your veggies and paneer/chicken for an hour... 

- while your kebabs are soaking up those spices, throw some wooden skewers in a load of water so they don't burn on the bbq

- after one hour stick your veggoes and paneer or chicken on skewers and bbq til cooked!

- serve with coleslaw! You could also do some jacket potatoes if you have the patience (scrub clean large potatoes, dry, rub in olive oil and salt, wrap in foil, thrown on bbq for an hour)

Yum!

Of course if its too hot/cold to sit out you could make all of these in the oven!

Falling out of love..... With FaceBook

We live in an ever changing, increasingly connected world, I live in India and rarely get homesick, i saw my best friends baby take his first steps two weeks ago, whilst none of my hometown friends made it to my wedding they all saw it almost immediately, I chat face to face with my sister in law and mother in law every sunday and I no longer have to wait until tuesday to find out all the celeb gossip, yet I can't help but wonder, are all these advances a good thing?

Facebook, in particular, is a really difficult one for me. A forum for morons to air their views and recruit more morons to their spiteful causes (yes EDL I mean you) and cause angry debates to rage, yet I think it is good people at least talk about the news and have the chance to stand up for themselves, I was so proud of many of my Muslim friends during recent events for standing up for themselves and their religion.

Then we have the issue of deleting people, totes awkward, the adult equivalent of crossing someone off your party list! I don't want to hear about the mundane lives of some of the people I went to school with, we weren't friends then and probably never will be, but then what if I delete them and then bump into them in the supermarket.... Difficult. What about when someone from the office who you don't really like adds you, you don't want to be rude and ignore them but then, do I really want the office weirdo knowing where me and my husband went at the weekend?

Facebook also seems to have bred a lot of attention seeking parents, if your kid is sick, get off facebook and look after it! I don't want to see photos of your snotty child and I am pretty sure when it is old enough to operate facebook (probably about 6 in the case of a lot of my schoolmates kids) they won't thank you for plastering their snotty sleepy face all over the net. One of my best mates kids has been born with actual problems and is at hospital a lot, she doesn't go on about it! If your kid has a weird rash and you're worried I can understand it, otherwise, shut up!

At the same time I love that I can chat to people I've met all over the world at any time, but then I am a total victim of social paranoia... I uploaded a photo on my wedding night and immediately thought No!!! I am meant to be having fun! What must people think??? But my best friends weren't there and the quickest way to show everyone was sadly, FB!

We then have the "like if you agree this horrendous photo of an abused child is wrong, ignore if you are a heartless bastard" photos, I mean, really??? Why would you do that?

Another pet hate of mine is "PMA" updates..... "I had a really awful day, doing my boring job, but you know, I'm SUCH a positive person, tomorrow will be a good day, PMA!!!" Then the next day is the same, and the next, i think thats Positively Mental Attitude there.

Checking in at the hospital.... See my point about sick kids. Only acceptable if you're having a kid!

Speaking of which, baby scan photos! Why would you want everyone you've ever met seeing the contents of your womb? It's SO weird! Keep something back please people!!! People say it's the easiest way of announcing it, erm, I've heard of baby brain but surely the easiest way of announcing it is saying "I'm pregnant!"?

Candy crush. If you are that bored, read a book. If you really insist on playing it, keep me out of it!

Peoples updates about TV also grind my gears! Once upon a drunk sunday night, some unfortunate soul announced on fb he did not want to know the result of the apprentice final. Even though we weren't watching, and were in India, me and my friends knew the results pretty much as soon as Sir Alan had announced them and my good friend M Ball then informed said unfortunate individual of this.... Much hilarity for us, that sad tv addict deserved it!

I'm not too comfortable with facebook & Instagram owning my photo's and collating so much information on me either. When will this intrusiveness end?

The ever evolving world we live in has some great creations, I particularly love ibooks. Ok so i can no longer pass a book on to a friend to read but that app has saved me soooo much baggage allowance its unreal, plus I can buy a new book from my sofa, amazing! The same goes for newsstand, I can read my favourite magazines every week in India and save a few trees!

My best friend sent me a photo of a note i passed her in class 14 years ago... I loved that reminder of days gone by. What do kids do now? Whats app under their desks? They'll never be able to look back on those! Although she did send me the photo on whats app.... 

Like i said before, I really like skyping my husbands family in the states, but there are downsides to skype, you have to look decent for a start and can't sneakily have a wee (come on, we've all done it) or look away at our phones, probably at some mundane PMA/babies got a fever update....

We're also constantly connected now, everywhere has wi fi, it is so rare to have a holiday and escape the world now, which is a shame. No one sends postcards anymore, even the last one i sent was from an app! I promise this post isn't sponsored by Apple!

In the last few days my favourite author has tweeted me and the lead singer of the band I loved as a teenager did too, that would not have happened a few years ago and I think its wonderful that people in the public eye can connect to their fans. It can get out of hand though, Amanda Bynes and Charlie Sheen, I mean you! And when I was a kid the only trolls I came across were naked with neon spiky hair. 

I think the thing I find most annoying about the social media obsessed, constantly connected world we live in is that I am well and truly hooked, could I come off facebook? No. Though I have to sift through a lot of crap, I can see what my friends are up to and they can catch up on my news too. Go without twitter for a week? Absolutely not. I need my news and entertainment. Leave my iphone at home while on holiday, who does that??

I'd love to get a postcard though!

Mushroom Curry

I love food, and I love finding new ways of serving up my faourite foods, i remember tasting aloo gobi for the first time years ago and realising there was so much more to cauliflower than cheese! 

A few weeks ago i had a lot of mushrooms looking a bit sad in my fridge and i really didn't fancy a stodgy risotto or pasta dish, I had a little look online and found an amazing, quick, and very easy recipe for mushroom curry on madhur jaffreys website! I have adapted it slightly, I hope you like it, this is a firm favourite in our house now!

The recipe uses ginger and garlic, I happily admit i am a lazy chef and can't be bothered fiddling about peeling garlic cloves and cutting the skin off ginger, never mind the stink on your hands when done! I always use ginger garlic paste, or frozen ginger and garlic, a god send!

The recipe also uses yoghurt, i didnt have any in when i made this last week so used milk instead, it worked just as well.

I think the secret ingredient that makes this dish so awesome is  the lemon juice!

 

Try it and let me know what you think! We had it as a light dinner with papads and curd!

Mushroom Curry

Ingredients

4cm (1½in) piece fresh ginger, peeled and chopped

3 garlic cloves, peeled and chopped (or use 1 heaped tsp ginger garlic paste)

1 medium onion, peeled and chopped in quarters

450g (1lb) mushrooms

4 tablespoons vegetable oil or ghee

3 tablespoons natural yoghurt

1 teaspoon tomato purée

2 teaspoons ground coriander

¼ teaspoon salt 

¼ - 1/2 teaspoon chilli powder

2 tablespoons chopped fresh coriander

1 tsp lemon juice

Step One

Put the ginger, onion and garlic into the container of an electric blender along with 3 tablespoons water and blend until smooth. Clean the mushrooms and cut them into halves or quarters, depending upon size.

Step Two

Put 2 tablespoons of the oil in a non-stick frying pan and set over high heat.When hot, put in the mushrooms. Stir and fry for 2–3 minutes or until the mushrooms have lost their raw look. Empty the contents of the pan into a bowl.Wipe the pan.

Step Three

Put the remaining oil into the pan and set over high heat. When hot, add the paste from the blender. Stir and fry for 3–5 minutes until it starts turning brown. Lower heat &  Add 1 tablespoon of the yoghurt and fry for 30 seconds. Add another tablespoon of the yoghurt and fry for 30 seconds. Do this a third time. Now add the tomato purée and fry for 30 seconds. Add the ground coriander and stir once or twice. Now put in 300ml (10fl oz) water, the mushrooms and their juices, salt and chilli powder. Stir and bring to a simmer. Squeeze in a load of lemon juice and adjust salt. Turn the heat to low and simmer for 5 minutes. Sprinkle the green coriander over the top before serving.